美國人電話留言

　　中國家庭并不常用電話答錄機（Answering Machine)，但在北美家庭，幾乎家家都用。外來電話撥入時，若該電話號碼的主人不在，就會讓撥入者聽到一段留言，這叫Answer。絕大多數(shù)的Answer都是千篇一律的：說明主人不在，請撥入者留下簡短信息及姓名電話號碼等。下面是小編收集整理的美國人電話留言，供大家參考借鑒，希望可以幫助到有需要的朋友。

　　以下幾則特別的Answer體現(xiàn)了美國人的幽默，你能體會出其幽默所在嗎？

　　1、 My wife and I cant come to the phone right now, but if youll leave your name and number, well get back to you as soon as were finished.

　　2、Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didnt lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, dont worry, I have plenty of money.

　　3、Hi, Im not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep（beep：主人的Answer講完以后，Answer Machine這時候來電話者就可以開始留言了。）

　　4、Hi! Johns answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and Ill stick your message to myself with one of these magnets（磁鐵）. 注：通常情況下，來電話者面對錄音講話都不太自然，所以語言往往很急促，三句兩句話就完了。這可苦壞了接聽留言的主人，聽多少遍都聽不清留言者到底是誰，講了些什么。對于母語非英文的人，這種感覺會更深。所以，以下這兩段幽默干脆就首先告訴電話撥入者，我的Answer Machine不好使，你且慢慢來。

　　5、Hello, this is Sallys microwave. Her answering machine just eloped（私奔）with her tape deck（磁帶驅(qū)動器）, so Im stuck with taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.

　　6、Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding（墻板，壁板）, windows, or a hot tub（浴盆）, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity（慈善團體）through their office and do not need their picture taken. If youre still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.

　　7、Hi. I am probably home. Im just avoiding someone I dont like. Leave me a message, and if I dont call back, its you.

　　8、This is not an answering machine--this is a telepathic（心靈感應(yīng)術(shù)）thought- recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling and a number where I can reach you, and Ill think about returning your call.注：tone：與對第3）句beep的注釋含義完全一樣，主人的Answer講完以后，Answer Machine會發(fā)出一聲beep,這時候來電話者就可以開始留言了。

　　9、Hi, this is George. Im sorry I cant answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.

　　10、If you are a burglar(夜賊), then were probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and cant come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably arent home and its safe to leave us a message.

　　11、Youre growing tired. Your eyelids(眼皮) are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower(毅力) and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to(感到無助而被迫做某事) leave your name, number, and a message.

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